notes on joan mitchell

in ,

some notes taken at the joan mitchell exhibition at san francisco museum of modern art

“this is a tree. I mean, it’s my idea of a tree which has nothing to do with a real tree.”
— joan mitchell

evenings on 73rd street

the orange is funny. 73rd street always felt brown to me. or a kind of grey brown like the fur on a real world-hardened squirrel.

maybe the gestures are hints at the people crowding the streets? the colours of their clothing flashing between buildings.

the red fits, but the orange I can’t quite make sense of. especially the one jagged hook in the center…like the men catching fish off the pier where I was walking this morning.

mud time

the violet pushes out here, like a secret being revealed or the first hours of dawn when the sun hasn’t made it quite over the horizon.

mud time like the stuff that caked my shoes as I trudged around le mont saint michel, the tide sliding in, claywet.

the clay is there too—that slick french clay that holds you like glue. your shoes almost pull off as you yank your foot free. the sound it makes… something like a slit throat.

that’s what the greens here are. the earth trying to swallow you back up.

untitled, 1961

“she risked the painting collapsing into unsightly chaos”

vétheuil

two people, one devouring the other.

OR

leaning down to kiss.

incredible how often those things overlap… or are even the same.

salut tom (for tom hess)

the yellow is almost warm but in a reserved kind of way. like when spring has sprouted but winter chill hangs on.

memory

nostalgia

sadness

la vie en rose

when you try to be relaxed but there’s that sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach.

on night sea, by agnes martin, 1963

in ,

sitting in front of “night sea”

it is completely different in person. it doesn’t even look like the pictures on the internet.

the gold leaf literally sparkles, but the line is so fine you have to lean in close to see it. it has to catch the light.

& it’s not blue! it’s more turquoise, but not a steady shade. each individual rectangle has a gradient from deep turquoise to deep ocean blue. the lines start to shift as you look at it. they start to trick you. & this is how you’re pulled in, like quicksand in slow motion.

& you can see her. where the lines don’t quite match up or reach the edges of the canvas. that’s where agnes lives.

it stands out for its depth. the way I feel sometimes when I cross a bridge & a voice says “jump”.

night sea undulates the way the ocean does when there’s not a shoreline in sight. it feels like floating on your back & you just dip your ears below the water. sound becomes just a suggestion. you’re in a different world now. do you have a body? does it matter? maybe you & your body are the same thing as the water. maybe there’s no grid where your body ends & the water begins.

starstruck

in ,

ventured to red rock canyon state park—one of my favourite parks in californa— to make an attempt at astrophotography. this was my first attempt at photographing the stars & it was mostly a big failure, but now I have a better idea of what to do for my next trip!

first & foremost I need to find a buddy to go out with me, because it is very dark out there at night & it’s a little disconcerting!

on joan

in

23 december 2021 - journal

rain.

joan didion died today.

I ordered two of her books.

the cats work up at 3 am running & jumping through the apartment.

it's the kind of grey morning that hangs in the air. everything is dim — its foreign to LA. the city wears it awkwardly. like an ill-fitting coat.

it’s quiet. almost feels like a town. the cars hum at a lower decibel — more space between them — like when molecules slow down & spread out. maybe you can find something in the spaces. like she did.

I turn my little heater on & the rush of its fan soothes me. the sun is up but you can’t see it. it’s hidden. a lot of things are that way.

big valley

in ,

big morongo canyon preserve is one of the 10 largest cottonwood & willow riparian habitats in california. managed by the bureau of land management, the reserve is a 31,000 acres. it is located in the transition zone between the mojave desert & the colorado desert.

salvation

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recently I found a handful of rolls of used film. with no memory of what might be on these I sent them off the be developed. this selection is from a road trip to salvation mountain about 5 years ago.

a little longer than expected

in ,
DSC_8614.jpg

spent some time yesterday lost in the mojave in red rock canyon state park. things could have gone very badly, but I had adequate supplies & the skills to navigate my way out & back to the highway. but it turned my 5ish mile morning hike turned into a 10+ mile trek.

I love the desert & a big part of that is the way it can be both dangerous & beautiful, as well as its unpredictability. the desert can be a hostile place but it’s also thriving & full of life. I still love the desert, but I’ll take a break from 10 mile hikes for a couple of weeks at least!

now on sale: fleurs de l'espace oracle deck!

in ,

Over the past year I’ve been working on creating an accessible & easy to use oracle deck for card readers of all skill levels & today that deck–Fleurs de L’Espace–is released for purchase!

I created this 33 card collage deck inspired by my 90s childhood intro to divination: the Magic 8 Ball. I wanted to create an oracle deck that was cool as hell but also easy to use–so that anyone could use it to get started on their cartomancy journey. This deck is all about building your intuition without the rules & regulations we sometimes ascribe to oracle cards of all types. There is no guide book, no rules, & your interpretations can go as deep as you feel is right! Use it as quick way to answer daily yes or no questions (it's small enough to carry in your bag) or sit with its short words & phrases a bit longer to dig into how you really feel about a topic. Fleurs de L'Espace is for everyone, from beginners wanting to get their divination feet wet to advanced readers who want an easy-to-use daily deck.

It was important to me to make the deck as accessible as possible, so I strove to keep the price point below $40. To save on overhead costs, you can purchase your copy of Fleurs De L’espace directly from the printer!

Buy the Deck

Oracles

in ,

if you know me you know I have been an avid tarot & oracle card reader for nearly two decades. over the past several months I’ve been developing my first original oracle deck to be released to the public. I wanted to create something that was fun & approachable to people with any level of experience reading & working with cards. fleurs de 'l’espace is what I came up with!

this is a 33 card collage deck designed & created by me. it’s meant to be used fast & loose, without the pomp & circumstance some other decks expect. to that end, there is no guidebook & no rules about how you use these funny little flower cards. the deck was inspired by my divination gateway drug: the magic 8 ball, & can be read as straightforward answers to simple questions or explored further, depending on your mood.

fleurs de l’espace will be available for sale SOON. stay tuned to my tarot insta (@nobullshittarot) & website (nobullshittarot.com) for launch details & more card previews on the way.